Tuesday, September 18, 2012


Today was a rough one. Being broke is stressful and scary, and Joey kinda has the weight of the world on his shoulders these days. The hardest part of being on bed rest is not being allowed to help out in any way anymore- I'm not bringing in any money, I can't pitch in with housework or cooking, (not that I've ever been much help in the cooking department) and while I'll admit it is nice to literally be ordered to just relax, it also makes me feel incredibly guilty. I feel like I'm just this blob on the couch making no contribution to anything whatsoever. BUT of course, that is not the case at all. I'm growing a baby, and that's pretty dang important. I'm truly grateful to be able to do so. Anyway, Joey had a particularly bad day at work and so when he got home, he vented to me for a bit. I guess you could say we both had a bit of a pity party for a minute. Meanwhile, the TV was on Sportscenter and they were doing a spotlight on this amazing 18-year-old who was born physically & mentally handicapped, who was able to overcome the odds and run on his high-school track team. In the first scene of the spotlight, it showed him struggling to put batteries into a toy firetruck. It took a few tries, but he did it. Joey and I just stopped and looked at each other, as if to say, "Wow. We're sitting here complaining about our money problems, and look what this kid goes through every day." I think we needed that little reminder of how lucky we truly are. Yes, we're already in crazy debt with hospital bills and lately it's been a struggle to even buy groceries. But we are in good health, the baby is in good health, and we have each other- not to mention amazing families who stand by us. I had another wake-up call just a few minutes after this, as I was scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed and saw a status update from one of my former patients at the hospital. This patient is a beautiful teenage girl who two years ago was in a car accident which left her paralyzed from the neck down. Her status update? "I may not be able to walk, but that does not mean I cannot chase my dreams." And here I am feeling sorry for myself because I'm going to be on bed rest for the next 10 weeks. How lucky am I?! In a few months, I get to walk around all I want, care for my baby, and get back to normal. So many of my amazing former patients will never have that freedom. They inspired me then, and they inspire me now more than ever. It's true what they say about gratitude. Being grateful is the only surefire way to be happy. And I have so very much to be grateful for.


Alli said...

Sounds like you and Joey are in a similar boat to me and Davin. Making rent and buying groceries is a struggle every. single. month. but we do our best to remember how lucky we are to have a place to live and our health. I know you two will make it.