Saturday, July 31, 2010

I've been Incepted.

So I FINALLY saw Inception the other day. I tend to steer clear from overly-hyped films, for the most part. But I do love Leo, and I also happen to have a major weakness for Joseph Gordon Leavitt. I knew I owed it to both of them to see this movie. And just as everyone said- it was amazing. Probably the best movie I've seen in years, and coming from me, that's a pretty big statement. But I didn't just love this movie because it was amazing. I loved it because I'm a big dream person. Not necessarily by choice, but I am. Ever since I was a little girl, I've always remembered my dreams. Almost every single morning of my life, I've been able to recount the dream I'd just woken up from in vivid detail. Now, at first, this was cool. It was entertaining to see what my mind would come up with while I was sleeping, and everyone got a kick out of the wacky things that ran through my subconscious every night. But before too long, I started having nightmares. Those are not so fun. I spent many a night sleeping on my parents' or my brothers' bedroom floors, because let's face it- when you wake up from a nightmare, the scariest thought in the world is the idea of going back to sleep in a room by yourself. Luckily, the nightmares became a lot less frequent as I entered my teen years, and by the time I was in high school, I hardly dreamt at all- well, okay, everyone dreams, but I was fortunate enough to not remember my dreams for a time, and therefore was able to enjoy virtually dream-less sleep for a few years. The nightmares started coming back only a couple of years ago, but they got worse. They progressed into what are technically known as "night terrors," which are much more intense than normal old nightmares. I know this for a fact, because I would wake up from them shaking, crying, screaming, gasping for air- and always in a cold sweat. This is some scary stuff; definitely no picnic. The fact that I am an insomniac to this day is certainly no coincidence. It got to a point where I was too afraid to go to sleep, so I just wouldn't let myself. I've stayed awake for days at a time, just so that I wouldn't have to dream. I took Melatonin for awhile to try and doze off at night, but it only worked for so long. I then resorted to asking my doctor for sleeping pills. But I hate sleeping pills. The hours of sleep that I get after taking a sleeping pill are never of any quality, and I always wake up feeling as tired as if I'd just woken from a nightmare, so it's kind of a lose-lose situation. I've come to realize in the past few years how valuable sleep is, and I envy people who can just fall asleep whenever they are tired, and wake up feeling refreshed. Anyway, about a year ago, I started seeing a therapist so that I could either obtain sleep medication, or somehow figure out how to solve this night terror issue once and for all. Turns out, this therapist had a daughter who also suffered from night terrors, and he introduced me to a process known as "lucid dreaming." It took some practice, but I am happy to say that I am now able to not only realize when I am dreaming- but I can also force myself to wake up from even the most terrifying nightmare. It's not easy; the only way I can describe the feeling is that it's as if I am walking on a bridge that is being smothered in quick sand, but if I concentrate hard enough, I KNOW I can make it across, and always just in the nick of time. The human brain is amazing, and the fact that I can have so much control over my own mind even when I am ASLEEP- well, that's just straight-up remarkable! The entire time I was watching Inception, I kept thinking, "Holy crap, this is lucid dreaming at its finest!" Not only was the movie incredible because of the storyline and the amazing acting, but also because it was all about techniques I have been practicing for months now. It got me all excited, which may or may not suggest how pathetic my life is right now, but whatever. Still pretty cool. The point that I'm trying to make here is that Inception was awesome, and if you haven't seen it, you need to go see it. Well worth the 6 bucks, to say the least. The End.

Thursday, July 29, 2010


So... I put a tracker on my blog, just to see how many views it gets. Apparently, a lot more people check in here than I would have thought. Which is both completely okay and flattering, but I must say that I'm a bit confused. If people are looking at my blog this often, why are they not commenting? Or should I say, why are YOU not commenting? Yes, you. Validate me, tell me how awesome I am- give me something! I know you're reading, so you may as well praise me while you're at it. I don't mind at all. Also, I have a few friends who keep blogs, and I love reading them and commenting on them. But I have noticed as of late that I am not listed in their "Blogs I Stalk" list. Not a single one of them. Not. ONE. Really, guys? Are you not allowed to add me to your official list because I don't have a cute husband to write about or darling babies to post pictures of? Are you ashamed to admit that you follow my blog?! I just feel I deserve some recognition, that's all. I mean, that's what a blog is for... right?

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Tess Colette.


I realized today that I've never actually put up photos along with any of my posts. So I decided to switch it up this time. And what better way to do that, than to dedicate a post to my baby sister, who also happens to be the most beautiful kid in the universe. Tess joined our family 5 years ago, but I can't even remember what life was like without her. She is a miracle and a blessing, and we adore her- and spoil her- like crazy. But look at that face; how could anyone not? Even though Tess is 20 years younger than me, she and I still have so much fun when we hang out and have "sister time." She's so smart, funny, & stinkin' adorable, it blows me away most of the time. And she's a total Dunshee; she's got the same goofy sense of humor as the rest of us. Not a day goes by that I don't think about Tess's birth mom, and how much love I have for her. She made an amazing, selfless decision, and gave our family the most amazing gift anyone can give. I would love to meet her one day, give her a huge hug, and just thank her. Although we could thank her a million times, and it still wouldn't be enough. Adoption is such a beautiful thing, and I have an incredible amount of respect and love for all birth mothers. I wish I could hug them all! Anyway, I sure do love my little sis. She's one of the greatest blessings in my life. I thank God every day for this sweet girl.
= )